Sex is like fine wine: it gets better with the years! Here is the decryption of the sexual positions adapted to each age.
Value does not await the number of years? Except when it comes to sex! The passing of time brings softness, strength and letting go of your antics: suddenly, you have to adapt your positions to your age. Follow the leader !
For starters, we ignore the mistakes we made in bed at 20 and the Olympic gymnast-style feats of strength: the beginnings of sex are never obvious. So let’s move on to the thirties option voluptuousness …
Sex at 30: spare your back
In your thirties, if the body is in good shape, the pelvis generally suffers from tension. Between the first pregnancies and joint pain, the lower back is abused. Some sexual positions then do not have the desired effect and even cause discomfort for some women. The solution ? Positions that relieve tension on the spine such as doggy style. Isa Herrera, physiotherapist in New York, highly recommends this position: “your hands and knees placed allow you to spare your back “. Another option? “The spoon position” , assures American sex therapist Amy Levine, because it allows total control and is optimized for women who have already had a first child.
What sexual position to adopt when you have back pain: </ p >
A Canadian study (*) looked at positions that may relieve men’s back pain during intercourse. After studying the movements of the spine in the classic positions, they were able to find one that would prevent back pain from worsening. Thus recreating the Kâma-Sûtra for those with low back pain.
Almost 27% of men suffer from recurring back pain in France. Lower back pain that intensifies when physical activity is performed, especially during sexual intercourse. In addition, the sex life makes the back pain more intense in 84% of cases.
Scientists at the University of Waterloo in Canada have taken this problem very seriously, to the delight of those with low back pain. They therefore studied, thanks to ten voluntary and healthy couples, the movements of the spine during two variants of the “missionary” position, two variants of the “doggy style” and of the “teaspoons” position. .
By observing where the pressure is exerted on the human body, scientists have concluded that one should choose his position according to the movement that triggers the pain. Thus defining a Kâma-Sûtra adapted to back pain:
Intolerance of movement: Avoid “teaspoons” and “doggy style”.
Extension intolerance: Avoid the “missionary” resting on the hands and the “doggy style” when the woman is resting on the elbows.
Bending intolerance: Avoid “teaspoons” and the “missionary” resting on the elbows.
The position of the missionary would therefore be the best suited.
Now that men with low back pain have the keys to feeling more comfortable during sex, women will also have their erotic position answer in a few months.
(*) Study published in the scientific journal Spine.
Sex at 40: between great adventures and sparing the sciatic nerve
At 40, your back, your hips and even your legs have become more sensitive to pain: stuck nerve, displacement of certain bones… Sex therefore becomes more technical. If the two sexual positions recommended for the thirties, the doggy style and the teaspoon are still relevant, the 40 years open the doors to new adventures. And hop: the perfect opportunity to test the Reverse Cow Girl: “ask your partner to lie on his back, and sit on top of him, back to his face” , recommends Isa Herrera.
You can also give free rein to your imagination by trying variations of the positions already well mastered since your 30 years such as “the iron” which is an adaptation of the position on all fours: “lie on your stomach , knees slightly bent and hips slightly raised. Slip a pillow under your chest for the best support ”.
5 sexual positions to (re) test:
Forgotten, neglected or downright unrecognized, these five positions are nevertheless very great. Our list of positions to experiment, and good reasons to get started.
Because sometimes you have to go back to basics, here are 5 sexual positions to (re) discover urgently.
- The missionary
What is that ? Come on, come on, you only know him… Why test the missionary? Because it’s the big forgotten about sex positions. And yet it is to sex what the little black dress is in fashion. Indispensable and timeless, word of the vagina. Enjoying a somewhat outdated image, he is unfairly considered the “Sunday hug”, the Michel Drucker of Kamasutra. And yet, it touches a sensitive point (“G”, of its first name), and can be embellished thanks to a supplement “leg in the air”, even “legs in the air”, or with the option pillow under the pelvis, to change the trajectory of the penis.
- The “overturned astride”
What is that ? The man is lying on his back, his shoulders and head protruding from the mattress and thrown back. The woman is astride him. Why test it? Because his orgasm will be increased tenfold. In what honor, you will say, since in this position he does not have the honor to see you? Quite simply because of the circulation of the blood towards his head abandoned in the vacuum, flowing in great quantity and thus exacerbating the power of the pleasure.
- The standing doggy style
What is that ? It is not about the woman of the hare mounted on its two hind legs, but rather the cult position slightly revisited, ignoring the bed and standing, legs straight, and torso bent. (If you can hold on to something, that’s better) Why test standing doggy style? Because the side “body offered to pleasure” has something very “Fifty shades”, but in truth it is you who control everything, by moving the pelvis and by varying the angle of penetration as you wish. .
- The Lotus Union
What is that ? The man is seated with his legs straight and wide apart. The woman puts her feet on either side of his chest and, legs slightly bent, lies down facing him. Why test it? Because the KamaSutra positions that you manage to do in real life without wondering who owns that foot or that elbow, it doesn’t run the streets. And because it gives him plenty of leeway to stroke your penis, one breast or the other, or even all three at the same time if he has three hands. (Or that you have small breasts)
- The pear tree or the wheelbarrow
What is that ? You rest on the ground, on your hands, while your companion lifts your hips. Once he’s brought them down to his level (well, his gender eh), you cross your ankles behind his back. Why test the pear tree? To shine at night (well it depends on the type of night) and prove to the world that you don’t have to be a great sportswoman to pass this event with flying colors. And to explain to us what it feels like, because we have never succeeded before.
Sex at 50: fighting against the drop in libido
The fifties are for many women the time of menopause. The drop in estrogen can affect sexuality and libido. According to specialist Isa Herrera, you should focus on sitting positions: “try a sitting position where you are facing your partner, perched on their knees”.
Another option is to lie on your back with a pillow under your hips to elevate the lower back and relieve the spine.
5 reasons that can explain a decrease in libido
You don’t want it anymore, the urge to make love seems to have left you a little while ago. Free yourself from guilt! You are not responsible for the drop in your libido. There are several reasons for this.
Depression:
You don’t want to make love anymore but not that … You don’t want anything anymore. The pain of living has invaded your daily life so as not to let go of you. Real illness, see a doctor quickly. Note that some drugs to treat depression, for example, can also cause a drop in libido.
A dramatic event:
Unemployment, loss of a loved one … during the phase of grief and shock, it is natural that your sexual desire is variable, or even nonexistent. Once this period has passed, your libido should gradually return. Above all, don’t put pressure on yourself.
Fatigue and stress:
Keep cool! Don’t be too hard on yourself, it will only make the situation worse. Take time for yourself, to rest. If you are unable to let go of your stress, you can see a psychologist who will help you vent.
The pill:
The most widely used method of contraception in France, the pill modifies the level of hormones present in women in order to prevent the release of eggs from the ovaries. In case of bad dosage or just side effect, the pill can cause upheavals in libido. Do not hesitate to talk to your gynecologist, who will refer you to another method of contraception or to another pill.
Relationship problems:
Lack of communication, routine, children … The couple sometimes tend to forget about themselves. Take the time to dialogue in order to jointly analyze the source of the problem. Getting your libido back won’t happen all at once. Be patient and learn again to seduce yourself by gradually introducing hugs and foreplay into your relationship. If, despite your efforts, the desire does not return, consider consulting a couples therapist.
Sex after 60: hot ahead
After 60 years, other ailments can interfere with sexuality: osteoarthritis, fatigue, etc … Never mind, we opt for positions without pressure. “I try to encourage my patients to stand up, which relieves pressure on the joints and also helps strengthen their bones,” says Lynn Berman, American physiotherapist. So at 60, you stay up to make love! Or, put on a bed full of pillows to relieve pressure points and spare your spine!
Making love after 60
In the closet, naughty hugs past a certain age? Certainly not. If the sexuality of seniors is somewhat different, it is no less cheerful! Yes, you can have sex after 60!
The sexuality of seniors, a taboo
It seems that after a certain age, we should no longer have sexuality. Most of us are overwhelmed by the news that our parents are still having sex. And yet! While some mourn their libido from a certain age, studies show that, on the contrary, seniors are always in search of pleasure. According to a British study *, 34% of seniors even say that their sex life has improved since they were 60!
The difficulties faced by seniors
For those who continue to have sexual activity, certain annoyances due to age may appear: vaginal dryness for women and erectile dysfunction for men. Hormonal or drug treatments can give a little boost to regain a little vitality … In addition, some people find their new body unwanted which can cause a drop in libido.
But after 60, we make love differently. And not necessarily less well …
The benefits of sex after 60
After a certain age, we are less in the performance. Women are detached from reproduction and therefore ready to welcome only pleasure. The imagination grows, and so do fantasies. Less pressure, more sensuality! And to stimulate the excitement of partners who are less vigorous, foreplay is lengthened! And above all, no one to disturb! More children, more work … in short, seniors are more available for sex!
* published in the New England Journal of Medicine
Article published on the Marie Claire website.